It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I GOT EATEN OUT IN A MERCEDES ON A TUESDAY NIGHT. I EARNED THIS SHIT.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
