why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
