Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
How was that girls surprise party last night?
Got absolutely destroyed tried to put somebody's leather jacket on and make out with their mother. You know.. the norm
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