so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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