I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
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