I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
he started frosting cupcakes and licking the mini-spatula realllllly deliberately and i don't know if i'm more attracted to him or the cupcakes
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