Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
i perioded on his leg
on. his. leg.
organizing the empties. That sober.
She woke up laying on my kitchen floor, ketchup bottle as her pillow, in front of my fridge.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
We're following a guy carrying a door for beer pong at his place..join us when you are deemed sober enough to leave the hospital.
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize