why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
Spent 30 minutes in the board meeting trying to figure out where the foul smell was coming from. Thought it was the guy's feet sitting next to me. Then i uncrossed my legs. Turns out it was my vagina. Thank goodness for travel size febreeeze.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
After the clumsiest day of my life I think it's safe to say my dream of being a ninja is dead. Memorial service with a glass of wine at 8pm
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
Randomize
