I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
