the roller ball on my blackberry is the closest i've come to touching a clit in 2 years.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Randomize
