I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
If you stick your dick in my spaghetti, we're fighting.
you know it's bad when you need sunglasses to open the refrigerator
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
