She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
Randomize