I'm laying in your front yard are you home
in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
Randomize
