I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I woke up with a meat pie in my hand and my mouth tasting like an ashtray. I'm a catch, really!
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
Randomize
