I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
For when you/if you wake up tomorrow.. You broke 4 of the bar's glasses tonight and I am currently watching you as you ride the broom around the bar instead of cleaning up your mess. I am no longer able to come up with excuses for you.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Also, for real, though? Did we even have sex or were we just jumping on the bed drunk and naked...because with me that's actually a possibility.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Randomize
