i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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