and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
Fixing to yell "you're too hot for her" at a Gerard butler look alike. There is absolutely no way this is going to end well...
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
I slipped in the shower today and broke my lighter..
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
How I know I would be an awful mother....I just stirred the bong up with a baby fork. A literal baby fork....
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