I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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