Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Sidenote: do you recall your "give me the d" chant
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
