I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Haha. Fifty shades ain't got shit on me. My tits look like they got in a fight.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
