well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
Phrase i just heard while watching the U.S. open: "Boy they have really trimmed it well, this has got to be the tightest hole in the Open."
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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