Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize