I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
He was going nice and slow, then he yelled " BOONNEESTOORRMM!!!!!". I can't walk straight.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
The dysfunction is strong in this one.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
