Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
They just gave us root beer floats. I guess I won't quit my job today.
Would it be inappropriate to do lines in front of the cable guy?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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