She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
she made sit in a corner, drink nothing but water and told me she was worried about me because i picked up an irish guy at a taxi rank. says the girl who invented tequila night and fucked a guy in a park across the street from a sweet sixteenth.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
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