Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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