That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
Randomize
