She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
If I had your ass I would rule the world
Randomize
