i don't plan on having that self control this summer
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I just split a tacobell party box with my boss. 12 tacos. We were equals for a moment.
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