Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
The kid next to me is typing a powerpoint presentation.. title: Reasons to Wear a Condom, subtitle: The Ian Story
The first slide was titled: You Could Get a Girl Pregnant.
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
He's a doctor now.. hope he can cure his small dick
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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