At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
It was like something out of a fucked up fairy tale. He just crowdsurfed over to her while riding a keg, said "come sail with me", and then the crowd carried them off into the night. What.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
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