he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
