After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
I'm not giving my ex her earrings back. If some chick i hated gave me brownies i would still eat them. It's the same thing.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
So, I'm stoned at his house petting the neighbors cat I made him steal.
You're a fucking train wreck.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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