Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
He somehow managed to accomplish karate kicking a door down, cockblocking my friend in the room, and writing "tits" all over the house with a blue sharpie.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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