im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I paid some man $10 for his shirt last night cause I liked it. Explains that. Bought the jackolope head from a street vendor. Got invited to someone's hotel rooftop swimming pool which explains why I was in my bathing suit. My clothes from last night are MIA. Going over the border with no pants on is awkward. Origins of the car rim still mysterious.
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
She said just put your tongue in there and don't linger. I have other things to do.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
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