thus making me awesome and them whores
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
Got blown by one of the bridesmaids. Family BBQ today. They all know. Talk about awkward.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
Nothing better than going to Mass on Easter Sunday with "I love penis" henna tattooed across your back. Love your Indian culture.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
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