If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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