do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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