Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
Randomize
