rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I taught a straight girl about grindr today. She showed me tinder. It was like some sexual cultural exchange program
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize