I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
8$ liquor pitchers. I'm gonna wear two or three pairs of underwear so when drunk me takes them off there'll still be a pair on.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
Your ankle brace is here and the saw is charged. Grab some vodka that cast is coming off tonight.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
I look like i have multiple stab wounds in my foot and there are footprints from the elevator to my room. What happened?
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
