okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
This is embarrassing but i think i might have left my fake tooth at your house on your night stand.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
If Dr Phil has taught me anything about myself, it’s that I can seriously relate to those women who fake their pregnancies.
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
