I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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