Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
