Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
Lost gin update. Blackout me found and re-hid the bottle. Left a note to myself saying, "GOOD LUCK, SUCKER!"
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Gold rum. Strong marijuana. Jabba the Hut in stilettos. Deep thigh bruise. Yes, thal all happened. Sorry dude.
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
Randomize
