keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
There really needs to be a redbox for wine because I want some but too lazy to walk into a store
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
