but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
You took it upon yourself to rid the world of them, and by that I mean you dressed up as Batman and started kicking them in the shins.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Randomize
