Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
As he walked by me and gave me his dreamy smile full of dimples all i could think was 'I gave you chlamydia'.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Randomize
