A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
