i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
If youre wondering about the smell, i set your hamster on fire. But don't worry he's ok
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I just smoked by myself in my childhood bedroom, how happy does it seem I am to be home for Christmas?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
I woke up to him crying and pouring pixy stix in my mouth saying they would bring me back to life.
Randomize
