Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I think that's the first time i've seen 'you look like an ugly version of my ex' work as a pickup line
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Can you bring me the toilet please
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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