I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
